On the final stretch (or 5 days to Step One)

I feel ready. I feel tired. I feel excited.

I feel ready for the seven hour multiple-choice marathon ahead. Yesterday, I practiced a full-length assessment from about 10a to 6p. I scored well enough and I’ve identified the final round of weaknesses that I’ll address this coming week. Not quite there, but where I need to be right now.

Today, I’m going to spend the morning writing, the afternoon planning, and the evening reviewing. I’m going to plan out the next five days: which subjects I will review and in what order so that I can peak on Friday, the day of Step One. Tonight, I’ll review the practice test and add to my ever-growing list of topics that I need to review.

I feel tired from staring at a computer screen. At the end of a study day, I know there are more things that I could have done and other topics that I should have covered. No amount of effort and solid studying feels like enough. It’s mentally exhausting.

The grind is coming to an end and I must stay focused as the countdown blares. I’ve delayed my test twice and the third date seems a charm. I almost forget what life outside of Step Prep is like. I look forward to rediscovering it.

I feel excited. I want to be outside, to learn the habits of the deer that inhabit my backyard, and to identify the edible plants that grow with enthusiasm. I want to root around the felled trees and to open up the space. I want to pile brush during the day and to enjoy bonfires at night. I have so many plans and ideas for these twenty acres of bountiful land and I cannot wait to realize them.

Five days of grind, then a weekend of delicious labor on this land. Early next week, my partner and I will head up to NH through Memorial Day weekend to spend time with my family. Then, third year will begin.

I feel ready. I feel tired. I feel excited.



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On Death Podcast

6 thoughts on “On the final stretch (or 5 days to Step One)

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